Saturday, June 5, 2010

LOST.

NO! not the tv show.
MY TEST!!!!
i was sitting at my parent's house today, (to get away from the screaming child at home with jason)....
Pat was my witness!!! as well as anyone within a 3 mile radius....

i was on question 72.
there were 100 questions.
i was about 2 hours and 30 minutes into the test....
and POOF!
the test was gone....
you cannot log back in.
you cannot go back to where you left off.
you cannot go back....
i was done.
the test,
was done.
my attempt at getting a good grade,
my past 2 weeks of studying....
every.
single.
day.
were gone.
the high hopes that i held that i would likely finish this with a good grade,
came crumbling down....
into my lap....
felt like i swallowed my heart.
=(

what a baby i am.
because i sat here as my eyes welled up with tears.
i felt like lewie.
i wanted to scream....
it wasn't just the past few hours of sitting in the same warm spot.
it was the past few weeks of non stop studying....
the crazy hectic drive
and unwillingness to give up, even though i felt like i was slowly slumping into a hole.
i was FINALLY beginning to understand this.
i felt MOTIVATED,
and like i was actually exercising my brain!

i know this doesn't sound like a big deal, but it just felt like my entire world crumbled in those few moments.

I already emailed my professor, but it clearly states in the syllabus that anything "non blackboard related" (blackboard, being the online classroom that we use), is not his fault.
i emailed him anyway....
he's got to be able to see how far into the test i was.
he's got to see that i JUST got booted!!
he's got to see that i was on a roll!!!!

even if i get credit for what i did get completed, it still won't be good enough.... a low C IF i get everything right....

pardon me while i go cry some more....

8 comments:

Ms. Anthropy said...

I would be crying too! Poor thing. You and Lewie can do a duet. Love the new header!

Ashley King said...

yeah, i can't kick my mood. i just want to cry.... i'm going to pack up and go back home, so lewie and i could cry a duet....

thanks! it's actually when i was VERY pregnant with Lewie (as i'm sure you can tell).... but i loved our pictures from that day.... =)

Bossy Betty said...

Breathe Deep! I teach online classes and realize these things happen. Since it's near the beginning of the course, he will have mercy.

LOVE the new header.

buymebarbies said...

How about a quartet? Include me and papa in that boo hoo party!!

Marlene said...

I'd be doing more than crying. I'd be uttering every four letter word known to mankind...and then I'd cry. You poor thing!!! I hope your prof takes an empathetic view to the whole mess and doesn't grade you poorly. :(

On another note - LOVE your new header! You are so pretty!

Pat Tillett said...

I predict the prof. is going to let you re-take the test. I'd bet my house on it! Oh wait, this is two days later...

Ashley King said...

Thank you Betty! you gave me hope that he might be a little bit understanding and i did shoot him an email even though our syllabus said not to.... i did anyway.... and it worked. =) SO thankful!

Marlene, thank you! it did work out wonderfully! =) thanks goodness!

mom, THANK YOU! i love the maternity pictures.... =)

at poppa, cheater!

Mainland Streel said...

I absolutely would have cried. :(


PS - your new header is awesome! I love that photo of you guys!