(note: "drama bugs" is an afterschool program similar to that of "drama club" in high school, only the kids are a lot smaller and this program costs a lot of money.)
i had just received an email earlier that day so I knew what the drama bugs were, and i knew that the next "session" was accepting new students into it and that the money was due by friday (which gave me 2 days to come up with that "extra" money).... i knew that they practiced for 10 weeks and that in May they would perform 2 shows for their family and friends. i knew that much.
so when she tells me this, i asked "what's drama bugs?"
she shrugs her shoulders.
me: "well then why do you want to join if you have no idea what it is?"
taylor: "well, i know that the drama bugs performed the polar express and it was AAAAAA-mazing mom!!! you should have seen it, and.... well.... i just want to do that too."
i (being the crazy obsessive, talk-you-out-of-anything-before-you-even-do-it, kind of person that apparently i am) say "the drama bugs is an acting class that meets for 10 weeks on either mondays or tuesdays for an hour and a half. after the ten weeks is up you will put on a show that your friends and family can come watch. it sounds like it'll be a lot of fun, but it's also a lot of money, so if you are going to join this, then you have to finish it. that means all 10 classes. you can't just go to the first class, decide you don't want to do it and then quit. if you don't like it, then you'll finish your 10 classes and after that we won't sign you up for the next time, and you'll have learned something that you don't like, and maybe in a few years you can give it another shot, but you aren't going to just go to one class and then quit. it costs too much for that, and besides you've got to learn what commitment is all about."
okay, so at the time i thought i was making a good point and teaching a good lesson....
and then i went and saw my therapist.
HOLY COW! when i look back on our conversation now, i'm amazed she didn't just start crying and throw up and tell me she never wants to do anything ever!!!! poor taylor!!!!! i am BRUTALLY HARD ON HER!!!! she's SEVEN YEARS OLD!!!! i need to let her be a kid.... let her try something, and have the confidence going in to it.... and IF she decided that she didn't like it after 1 or 2 weeks, THEN i could have talked to her at THAT time and told her that the class cost a lot of money and that she'd better march her behind RIGHT back into that class and work her butt off or i'd never ever pay for her to join another group ever again in her entire life.... okay, so i'm totally kidding. (calm down, mom). no, then at THAT time i could have told her that i would really like her to finish the class. it would mean a lot to me, (and to her eventually) if she'd finish the class that i paid all of my last pennies for (okay, totally kidding again).... i'm not entirely sure what i'd say, but i'd say something that was really comforting and sympathetic to a 7 yr old, because that's what i'm working on....
so although i don't know what i'd say, just know that it would be something nice.... er, nicer than how i've been before. i'm not MEAN, i'm just not the most sympathetic person ever.
and well, i guess that having a child when you are 19, you are still learning as you go. heck being a mom at 26 for the second time, i am STILL learning as i go....
needless to say, taylor went to drama bugs.
she brought home a script.
next week she's bringing home a cd (with all the music on it), and so far so good.
she loved it.
i hope she keeps it up.
this could be good....