Thursday, December 3, 2009

sleepless wonders

So I'm lying here in bed. It's not much past 9, but it feels like it's dead in the middle of the night.... What would normally be a night I'd be fast asleep, has very much turned in to a night with me lying here.... On my left side, squinting my eyes to see the small font on my blackberry....

My mind won't shut off, though it hardly does. Tonight, for whatever reason, it's on.... And not only turned on, but turned up.... To like the Nth degree....

So as I'm lying here, everything seems so loud. I wonder SO many things, that I'm actually wondering why I'm even wondering about these lame things!

I wonder where the sound of someone else's running water is coming from.... I can't tell if it's the condo beneath us, behind us, next to us.... For all I know, it's someone showering in my room.... Because that's what it sounds like.... Which leads me to my next wonder. I wonder what it sounds like to my downstairs neighbor when we move, when we walk, we I flush the toilet, when (jason) farts in bed.... Because IIII would never do such a thing. (Tee hee hee)....

I wonder how the difference between night and day somehow seems to be like 40 degrees or more! where do those 40 degrees go at night? Like to another planet? Cuz it sure feels like it.....

I wonder why Lewie went to bed at 6 something tonight? Aren't we the old folks here? Not him? Which then leads me to wondering since he went to bed at 6 something tonight, what glorious hour of the night is he going to wake up and decide he's slept enough, and what "pre-dawn" hour will be the perfect one to party (party of 1, that is).... I have nooo idea, but I'm in nooo hurry to find out....

I wonder why the guy, Rick, from Living spaces was such an absolute jerk when I called earlier.... I wonder if he was having a bad day or if he's always that rude to customers.... I wonder if people have actually cancelled their orders because of Rick's bad attitude.... I actually re-named him to myself (in my head) when he put me on hold, but it wasn't a very nice name, so I won't share it on here....

I wonder how I ended up with such a great husband who loves me so much and takes suuuuch great care of me without ever complaining, except if he thinks I'm doing too much.... (Well while I'm not feeling well).... Cuz if I DO feel okay, he doesn't mind barking orders, which are usually shot down immediately, just because I don't like being told what to do.... Which probably stems from me having father issues.... Which leads me to wonder how I ended up with him, and how he ended up with me.... Because he really likes to try to tell me what to do, and I really don't like to be told what to do, and we butt heads and most of the time just laugh at how incredibly dysfunctional (but happy) we are.... So I guess I kind of answered my own question there.... For whatever reason God put us together, I'm grateful for it, none-the-less....

I wonder why chocolate chip cookies taste soooo good... And why sweets like this and brownies and chocolate milk taste sooo exceptionally great first thing in the morning....
I WAS going to say "I wonder why these last 20 lbs of weight I want to shed, aren't just running away or shedding," but I think my previous "wonder" answered that question.... Darn.

I wonder why things come in waves.... Why you can feel one way about some certain thing or situation, and in a matter of days, hours, heck, even after hearing a song, why your feelings can completely (and I mean COMPLETELY) change the way you feel ENTIRELY.... I wonder if I am the only one who feels that way....

I wonder why I can't sleep, and why I'm wondering so much.... I wonder why it comes in waves....

2 comments:

buymebarbies said...

GOSH!!! I really, really love you Ash!!! You are Paula's daughter!!!! You say all the things I always wanted to but never knew how or would even try!! Thank you!!!!

Ashley King said...

hee mee mee...